Lately, I've found myself wondering whether a strong concern for one's self-interests automatically precludes a strong concern for the interests of others. A few months ago I would've said yes. Having been one who has strived for magnanimity and - probably a more relevant practice - altruism, sacrifice and compromise seemed rather valiant -- anything contrary, an aberration.
In examining what my so-called self-interests are - among others, morality, education, and service - I've come to realize that a strong concern for others and the ability maintain an interpersonal relationship effectively can only be achieved when I place my self-interests in the foreground. Unless I find contentment in who I am and what defines me, "I" will cease to exist; Rand said it best: "[happiness] is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values."
After all, it is only after I've developed a clear understanding and acceptance of the things that define the aforementioned interests can I truly and wholeheartedly give.
2 comments:
Is there a purpose to this wholehearted giving, or is giving good in and of itself?
I agree: you must be happy... and that happiness is invariably sourced from the achievement of your values... before you can ever hope to be the complimentary 'other' half in a committed, interpresonal relationship.
To know one's self is part and parcel to knowing another. If ever we are compensating for something missing within, we are stealing from that which is selflessly given to us by the other.
Well said, sir. Even I haven't yet managed to squeeze in a quote from Ayn, and I've had much more time to do so.
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